My condolences. My father plays a huge role in my life. He's got Parkinson's Disease and has had it for well over a decade now... it will eventually kill him. So I've had time to think about this. The truth is, when it comes time, I have no idea how I will deal with it. But my father, being the person he is, would want me to live my life to the best of my ability and live it without getting hung up on the little things. The reality is that we all die eventually, like it or not. To honor the memory of our loved ones we should do what they would want and I doubt they would want us to be so stricken with grief as to shut down our lives. I like what michael_dorfman had to say; you are very fortunate that you got to spend as much time as you did with your father. Cherish his memory, always.