Am I the only person who thought that list was a poem? :) Here is how my mind read it:
I block ads in the browser, I block their DNS
I block beacons and the ping attribute in their URLs
I block analytics, reporting, and diagnostic logging
I block programmatic pleas to disable ad-blocking
I strip query strings from UTM campaign tags
I unshorten URLs to avoid tracking hacks
I stop autoplay for the videos on my feed
I block all the cookies that your websites don't strictly need
I block the visibility API on your page
I block prompts to install your app in a fit of rage
I block hidden pixels that track my email
Which surely gets masked but to no avail
As I unsubscribe from your mailing list, dork
And block your address if that doesn't work
I block and report SMS that have ads
Phone calls get ignored if not from my contacts
I pay a company to wrangle data brokers for the win
And trust me, junk mail goes straight into the bin
As I unsubscribe from it all when I can
I block ads, and you should block too, my dear friend
(Written organically, without ChatGPT or the like)
I took your text and asked chatgpt to turn it into a fun poem:
I surf the web with playful glee,
Blocking ads, just watch and see!
In my browser, they won't appear,
DNS blocked, they shed a tear.
Beacons and pings, they can't track me,
URLs confused, they cannot be.
Analytics and logs, no data they'll find,
Programmatic pleas, they're left behind.
Campaign tags, I strip them bare,
UTM queries, I won't share.
Unshorten URLs, a clever trick,
Tracking hacks, they're in a fix.
Autoplay videos, I make them stop,
No more interruptions, no more flop.
Cookies, beware! I block you all,
Only the necessary ones may crawl.
Visibility API, you can't spy,
No prompts to install, no need to try.
Hidden pixels, stay out of sight,
My email's safe, try as you might.
Unsubscribe, I'll show you the door,
No more emails, I'll take no more.
Block your address, a final resort,
No more junk in my digital fort.
SMS ads, they come my way,
But I block and report, come what may.
Phone calls, ignored if not my friend,
Only contacts, let the ringing send.
Data brokers, they won't win,
I pay a company to wrangle them in.
Junk mail, it's a thing of the past,
Straight into the bin, it's gone at last.
So join me, my dear friend so true,
Block those ads, they're not for you!
Let's surf the web with joyful cheer,
No ads, no tracking, have no fear!
